Are you a single Parent in the Newark area? If so, you are not alone. Did you know that over 30% of USA families are run by single parenting households? As a pastor at Oasis-Church-NJ.com, and former Family Court Mediator, I know that single parenting is a difficult job. However, children residing in single parenting homes usually have it even more difficult because they are deprived of the full time guidance and direction of two parents, which is so essential for their moral, spiritual and character growth.
Single Parenting and Risks
Having worked in Family Court several decades, I can tell you that children growing up in single parenting households without any real influence from the other single parent are at increased risk for delinquency, having children out of wedlock, poverty, drug addiction, low self esteem, divorce and suicide.
What can you as a single parent do to help your children? The good news is that the above risks can be lowered to near zero if the the custodial and non-custodial single parents put into practice the following single parenting tips.
Single Parenting Do's
Single Parenting Tip 1-Forgive the Other Parent
Of course we understand there may be pain, bitterness, betrayal and hurt. But forgiveness brings great healing, not only for yourself, but also your children. It's extremely important that the children have in their minds an image of two good parents. How you treat the other single parent, and what you say about them in front of the kids will have a great influence here.
Single Parenting Tip 2-Encourage Parenting Time for the Other Party
I know this parenting tip can be difficult under certain circumstances, but your children's emotional well-being depends on it. So don't allow your personal feelings to interfere with the long term health of your kids. Understanding the importance of co-parenting, the State of Washington, USA, recently introduced a "Co-Parenting" Bill which reads:
"The best interest of the child is ordinarily served when the existing pattern of interaction between a parent and child is altered only to the extent necessitated by the changed relationship of the parents or as required to protect the child from physical, mental, or emotional harm"
Single Parenting Tip 3-Mediate Any Parenting Conflicts
Avoid custody court battles, and do keep your kids out of the court system. Not only will this save you tons of money in the long run, you will also save your children and yourself the high stress of going through a Court ordered evaluation. Believe me, you'll thank me later
Single Parenting Tip 4-Make Parenting Time Enjoyable for the Kids
Custodial single parents should encourage the children to go and have a guilt free, good time. Neither party should grill the children about the other party when they return for visits. This is extremely detrimental to them.
Single Parenting Tip 5-Pursue Single Parent Dating Slowly
We've written an extensive article on Single Parents dating with kids, as well as the pitfalls of single parenting and dating relationships. Contact us for this info. Following those tips will help you avoid hurting your children.
Single Parenting Tip 6-Guard the Spiritual Well Being of the Family
Get support for your family by hooking them into a caring local church or other place of worship. Finding support for yourself by joining a support group will help give you strength to fulfill your single parenting responsibilities.
Oasis is a 3 year old NJ Non-Denominational Church with totally LIVE services 2 FUN locations for the whole family:
Oasis meets Sundays 11am at Snuffy's Pantagis Renaissance at 250 Park Ave in Scotch Plains. The church utilizes the awesome ballrooms for its service. Oasis equals great Kids programs, a worshipful but Rockin' band, relevant messages for everyday life & a chance to meet new friends. :)
The second location gathers Sundays 10am "Sharp" at the Regal Hadley Cinema in South Plainfield , where it rents 3 theaters for the adults and kids. Need more info? Call 732-406-7821